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JhanisMum Profile
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Registered: 11-2006
Location: Rossendale,Lancashire,U.K.
Posts: 7753
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Identity


I've been thinking a lot about this just lately.Now,I don't like to take myself too seriously and this is all simply idle musings but,the other week,a friend said something that really puzzled me.I was in a car with three female friends and they were all agreeing that,when you get to a certain age,you stop bothering so much about your appearance.Now,partially making fun of myself I said that ,in that case,I'd never got past my teenage years.One of my friends then said,in a jokey way,that I 'hid behind my image'.Now,most of my female friends don't wear make up,shave their legs etc. but I do.I've never felt that they should do the same and I think that they're all beautiful in their own way.Why would she think that I hide behind my image?I never let appearance stop me from doing anything,I only apply my make up in the mornings and then forget about it.Any thoughts or am I just being self indulgent?Do you feel that,when you get to a certain age you'll stop caring what you look like?Do you not care now?Is there any difference between decorating yourself and decorating your living space?Don't we all choose what clothes to buy,even if we claim to just throw on whatever clothes fall out of the wardrobe?Would you wear anything?
Thoughts please. emoticon

---
Maya maya,
All this world is but a play,
Be thou the joyful player.



8/12/2011, 5:46 am Link to this post
 
vashkor Profile
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Re:


Not bothering about appearance is also a choice of appearance. You shave your legs, they don't, they comb their hair, you don't. You are always making those decisions of either doing something or not doing something. A guy who carelessly skips to shave his face is actually choosing to have a beard, no? As long as one is aware and in control of how s/he looks, I can't say anybody is hiding behind images. Any sane person is concerned of his/her image and how others react to it, and at the same time these images that we build are always reactions to the influence of others. And by the way, adaption and rejection are both influences.

It seems your friends mean that with age people become more "honest" with their appearance. I disagree. In my opinion, if age has any influence over you dealing with your image then it may be that it adds more consistency. I find that older people simply experiment less. As you age you become more sure of how you should appear. You and your friends are both sticking to something, only differently. That's how I see it.

---

8/12/2011, 2:36 pm Link to this post   
 
JhanisMum Profile
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Re:


Thanks babe! xxx

---
Maya maya,
All this world is but a play,
Be thou the joyful player.



8/12/2011, 4:15 pm Link to this post
 
Jesus Wins666 Profile
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Re: Identity


Your friend is just jealous of your beauty emoticon

" QUOTE "

vashkor wrote:

In my opinion, if age has any influence over you dealing with your image then it may be that it adds more consistency. I find that older people simply experiment less. As you age you become more sure of how you should appear. You and your friends are both sticking to something, only differently.



I agree with this

---
Shit happens; Toilets flush
8/12/2011, 10:23 pm Link to this post   
 
JhanisMum Profile
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Haha,aww,bless!

---
Maya maya,
All this world is but a play,
Be thou the joyful player.



8/13/2011, 4:57 am Link to this post
 
ohm Profile
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KnottyLocks.Tk

Registered: 07-2006
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Re:


That's an interesting perception. I think it's your friend's issue , not yours. Funny, as I grow older, I still care about my appearance, put the makeup on in them morning too! In fact, I found that as I aged, I was able to take a bit more care with my appearance as my income increased.

The women in my family also continue to perfect their "looks" as we age. Mom always liked shoes and dresses (she passed at 80).

It is just as ok for you to shave as it is for them not to. It comes down to preference and your own perception of your beauty, not someone else's opinion.

8/13/2011, 9:54 am Link to this post
 
JhanisMum Profile
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Re:


It's a curious issue isn't it?I've spent many years now being the most 'made up' woman in my group of friends and,occasionally getting a bit of stick for it.They're all very earthy,natural types and I've sometimes felt like I'm letting the side down,haha!Recently however,I've become good friends with a lovely woman who's image is very striking and who has the same influences as I do,musically and culturally and that has helped a lot.I can share my love of clothes etc. with her and not feel like such a freak!
 


---
Maya maya,
All this world is but a play,
Be thou the joyful player.



8/13/2011, 10:17 am Link to this post
 
munki6 Profile
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Re: Identity


I was actually thinking about this a few days ago because my dad's been asking me to cut my hair and had a go at me about it claiming that I won't cut because apparently, and I quote; "You like the attention" which isn't true at all, just that I feel comfortable with it and I like having longer hair than shorter hair - it just feels like that's *me*. I guess it's the same thing as "hiding behind your image" I suppose.

I started thinking about it for a while. I'm not one to care about what I look like. I don't even buy my own clothes. The only pair of clothing I have ever bought myself was a pair of jeans. My mother bought me everything else(I still wear clothes I used to when I was 15 ha ha) and I haven't bothered ditching any of the stuff till they end up with holes in them or get lost somewhere. I literally put anything I find on aswell and I hate looking at myself in the mirror - I feel embarrassed to do it, almost as if I quietly say to myself "Stop being so vain." So I too cannot really understand why my father would say this to me, after all, why would a person who doesn't care at all about his appearance be "looking for attention". Rather silly way to go about it. I'd rather dress up like Russel Brand or Helena Bonham Carter if attention is what I was going for(Or Marilyn Manson and Gaga if I wanted a LOT of it)..

I began to look at my friends who all dressed a certain way and looked a certain way now - way different from years before, and here I am getting ID'd at bars because I'm walking around in shorts and a silly old skateboard/band t-shirt like I'm still 12 years old. Why have they changed and I haven't? I don't really know. I suppose Vashkor's theory about experimentation has got something to do with it perhaps? Maybe I'm just happy being *me* and they're still trying to find them? It is very confusing.

I also read something a while ago and one of my best friends also mentioned something similar to me about how the way you dress reflects on who you are, i.e; If you look after yourself, you're probably(or appear to be) a very confident, hardworking person who takes action when they need to. If you don't care, you don't care about anything. You have no aims in life, you do not care about anything the world throws at you, it's all just taken with a pinch of salt because you have no self confidence or self respect. I don't really know what to make of that.

It is quite a curious topic indeed.

---
2:3:3
8/24/2011, 8:42 pm Link to this post   
 


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